Ep 62 – Qs to reflect on when indecisive
By Shweta
Do you find your mind constantly wavering from one option to the other while making an important decision? Add to that today’s ever growing world of opportunities offering more options for every decision, makes indecisiveness a potent threat that we must combat to navigate life with ease.
Some amount of indecision is good when it comes to larger life issues. It means the choice is important and we are giving it its due consideration. But prolonged indecisiveness can cripple our lives and leave us miserable.
Hello and welcome back to the Deep Dive series of the Being Meraklis podcast and I’m your host and self-awareness coach Shwetha Sivaraman helping you ask the right questions. Today we are exploring indecisiveness.
Let’s understand why we are indecisive in the first place. The first and most obvious reason is our overarching need for certainty. When we want to be 100% sure that our decision is accurate, and there is no scope for error, we put tremendous pressure on ourselves to find the right answer which we never want to regret. But that’s quite an impossible task given nothing in life is certain.
Additionally, one might be afraid of making the wrong decision or being perceived as imperfect. The fear of possible failure and the need for perfectionism combined make a lethal combination that paralyses us from moving in any particular direction.
Lastly this indecisiveness can be traced back to fundamental lack of trust or self confidence. If one doesn’t trust their own capabilities, making a decision, especially the important ones can become excruciatingly painful.
The biggest challenge with indecisiveness is that it doesn’t come alone. It comes with anxiety, stress, depression, and makes one avoid or procrastinate important decisions or actions.
If you’re one among them, here are some questions to ask yourself:
- What are the fears holding me back from making a decision? List them down with compassion for yourself and gently evaluate how rational each of those fears are.
- What is the opportunity cost of not making a decision? We believe we have all the time in the world, but for every decision we postpone there is a price we pay, the lost opportunity of doing things earlier. So if you find yourself being indecisive for long stretches, identify what is the price you’re paying by not deciding and ask yourself is it worth it?
- Is there a smaller decision you can make towards this larger confusion? A small step can help us move forward without worrying about the consequences while giving us confidence to take bigger steps consequently. Identify that small step towards your future.
And, lastly step out of your mind. Mind has no certainty about anything. Like Osho says,
“Mind is never decisive. Mind is indecisiveness. The functioning of the mind is to waver between two polar opposites and try to find which is right way. It is like closing your eyes and trying to find the door. Certainly you’ll feel yourself hanging between the two. Instead become aware of the mind. Whatever the polarity just be aware of it. First you’ll realize you’re not the mind. Second that awareness has a decisiveness that mind never has.”
Curious to know more about how awareness can help you be more decisive? Reach out to me for a 30 min discovery session on how I can offer 1:1 support in your journey as your Coach. I can personally vouch that Deepening self-awareness can influence all aspects of our life including indecisiveness.
Until we meet again, this is Shwetha signing off hoping you have a fabulous week ahead
